Writing Again

Someone complained that I don't write enough in my blog. He remarked that it is a very good procrastination tool and he's right because I should be studying for my test today but I can't concentrate. So I blogged.

I got to spend this weekend alone again, with the apartment all to myself. That was nice. Romain didn't feed the cats before he left this morning, meaning they flipped out at me. That boy is so frustrating. And rude. Grr.

The weather has been fairly crappy lately and doesn't look to be improving until Friday, which is fortunate for my mother because that's when she'll be arriving.

I had a dream about one of those giant warehouse stores like Costco. Me and the others at the institute were being taken on a tour. I think it means I miss America. Oh well. 32 days.

French Women Aren't Fat

While that's not true across the board, one cannot deny that French women, in general, are a whole lot skinnier than American women. While the average American woman is 5'4'' and 164 lbs (BMI 28.1), the average French woman is about 5'3'' and 137 lbs (BMI 24.3). The average American woman is borderline obese and the average French woman is on the higher end of healthy weight.

Why am I mentioning this? Because I've been noticing this difference. In America, I'm not big at all. I'm in a nice middle range, where the girl walking around in size 00 pants is a minority and you know that the women the media portrays are nothing like the women in everyday life.

But here, those skinny women on TV are just walking down the street in chic clothes and heels, not only dressing better than I do on a regular basis (another Frenchism) but looking thinner and more attractive. In a group of girls, it's not the skinny girl who stands out, but the girl you wouldn't even think as "chubby" in the US who does.

Basically, my point is, that this all makes me feel insecure. I will never have slim legs or small hips, my arms are a little chubby up top, but my waist is generally slim and I have a nice back and I'm pretty, but goddamnit, I still feel insecure. Not to mention the fact that I've been eating more than I usually do here. I don't really like my host mom's food too much and in the US I'm used to eating just whenever I feel like it without having to worry about scheduled meals. However, eating whenever I feel like it and then having to sit down to a dinner means I'm eating at least one extra meal per day. It's better now that I'm just pretty much sucking it up and cutting out superfluous eating (or replacing the Nutella toast with fruit) but I won't be as skinny as most any French girl I pass.

It's just GETTING to me. I don't want comments telling me to work out or eat better (not that I think I've been writing in this often enough for people to bother to keep on checking it), I just want to write this all out and complain for a bit. Complain about how I feel fat, even though I know I'm not fat, and actually look better than most of the people I know who work out.

And that's all that really matters, how I feel. (And whether or not I'm healthy, which my doctor says I am, even if I can't run a six minute mile. Or a seven minute mile, probably.) I dunno. Maybe I'll take the time to dance around my room more often. That's a fairly aerobic activity, especially with dance music today.

Apparently Spring comes in the second week of March in the South of France.

As I type to you, my faithful readers, I am sitting on my host family's balcony/patio and it is seventy degrees, the sky is a lovely shade of blue and I'm wearing shorts. Today is a fruit kind of day. By which I mean, all I want to eat are plums but I only have one left. Regardless, I shall enjoy it.

Unfortunately for me, today a bird pooped on me. Thankfully, I was only two minutes from the institute and so I quickly ran back and washed up, much to the amusement of Cali and Laura who were with me.

All the French people laughed at me.

But honestly, today is really nice and unspoiled, despite the birds.

I have decided that I HATE my host brother. He is annoying, loud, rude and he talks too fast. Not only is he loud in the sense that he makes a lot of noise, he'll SCREAM. Like a whining cat. For no reason at all. He's obnoxious and I am sick of hearing him be a smart-ass. I'm sick of him thinking I'm stupid just because he speaks a mile a minute. I can't understand anyone in French when they speak a mile a minute, not to mention his retainer makes it even more difficult to understand him.

And he TORTURES his cat, Biscuit. You can hear her trying to escape him, whining and crying, and he just laughs. He thinks it's the funniest thing in the world, to make this cat miserable.

If he were my brother, I'd hit him. All the time. Until he learned not to be such a jackass or until he went braindead and lost the ability to speak.

Thank god Ryan is my brother and not this d-bag. (Excuse my language, I hate that word but it describes him perfectly.) At first I wondered why his mom was out of the house so much and didn't pay attention to her son, but obviously she's counting down the days until he leaves. I would too, were I her.

I just realized - Roger's gonna get a better room than me, isn't he? Damnit. I wish my housing lottery number was better. And Jess and Deirdre too. Dangit. I refuse to live in a room with anymore people than just me. (i.e. it has to be a single.) I refuse, I tell ya!

I'm bored. I wish someone would go online and chat with me. I'm also hungry. I might stop off at the yellow place and get me some food. I am annoyed because my "g" and "a" buttons on my keyboard aren't working properly and I don't know why.

La la la. I have to apply to the theme house now. La la la.

Still Alive

Still alive but don't have much time. I leave early in the morning tomorrow for England. Didn't get to visit the Eiffel Tower. I went to Versailles today. I wish I had some time to chat with peeps from home. But internet time is expensive. I had an interview today with the Family Equality Council. I'll find out by April whether it's accepted.

Woo.

Cali is Sexy

Hey everyone! Long time no blog. (I don't think I'm funny either.)

I am in Paris right now and have very little access to the internet. Teh sucks.

Paris is jaunty. Cali is teh awesome. The hostel is pretty sweet. Apparently, however, Cali LIED when she said it would just be one big bed for the four of us. There are bunk beds. I totes called the bottom. And Cali did too. She's quite the copycat. The sexy copycat. Who planned the entire trip.

If you haven't figured it out yet, she's standing right behind me.

But seriously, though I am exhausted, I'm enjoying my vacay quite a bit. Time to rest and then eat some Mexican food because we're in Paris.

Love, Mandi

Cali is smelly

I think the title of this post explains it all.

Utter Crap

Today has been utter crap. I got back a pretty bad grade in one of my classes (and compared to what everyone else got, it's practically an A, which means it's the teacher, not the class) and it put me in a bad mood and then we had to watch the news in French which is really difficult to understand because the newscasters speak so much faster than the average person so I don't even know WHY we freaking watch it, and I'm tired and I feel like I'm annoying people and it's really frustrating to think that because then it's like, well how do I stop? I try not to interrupt people, but sometimes I do before I even realize it, and then I never feel like I sound sincere when I apologize, even if I am actually sorry, which might or might not show through, which means I might or might not know if I'm annoying people/coming across as some insincere bitch.

Ugh. I hate Wednesdays. And this one is turning out to be utter crap.

Cat - 1

Biscott scratched up Romain's face. Good. He doesn't play with her correctly. Or nicely.

After dinner tonight, we had another galette des rois. It was delicious. It was the northern variety, with lots of delicious butter and it was flakey and good.

So I've been thinking.

A dangerous pastime, I know.

(Points to whoever gets the reference.)

I'm incredibly bored today. I just don't have much to do, but I've been thinking a lot. I guess a couple of things I can't really mention here have happened recently and it's led me to ponder over the nature of things, to guess the way people will react to given situations. And one thing I've re-concluded is my definite nature of monogamy, and the other is that sometimes I really don't know what to say.

It's not a question of what I owe to whom, because I know who has priority in my life over any other given person or situation. (I hate how that sounds, by the way, like I'm building up some situation where if two people were hanging off a cliff, I know who I'd save.) It's nothing like that, but it's a question of what can I do for someone, some people, in a certain situation that would best benefit them. And really, I don't know what exactly is the best choice because I don't know how other people will react. Not everyone appreciates knowing everything or being helped. Not all situations would be made the better for a person knowing something.

This isn't so serious as I'm making it out to be. (Have I typed this before? I'm getting some mad déja vu.) Maybe I'm just itching for some drama to make my day a little more exciting. Maybe it's also that I feel bad about some of the things I kinda just blurt out.

Anyway, this post just got a little emo. I might delete it.

Nutella, Nutella, Nutella.

I think I might post more videos, though they might be less interesting. Here's the link to my first one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXVnsKPwqAo

Nimes

Wow. So today was an excursion day. Rainy and cold, I awoke at 8 to the sound of my cell phone alarm, the prickly dream of spiders still brushing across my fingers. The humid warmth of my room, bright with orange light, was a distinct contrast to the dark gray sky and damp pavement outside where I walked, curling my fingers against the cold.We waited in front of the train station for everyone to appear, scanning the streets for our peers while laughing at the cold. I wasn't the first to walk past those old city walls, but I wasn't the last - a significant difference from my current record of timeliness.

Once on the bus, the sway of the vehicle lulled me into silence. Hills of muted green bushes scraggled from the rocky earth between fields of empty olive trees and small, stone houses shut up from the weather. It was calming and quiet.

Nîmes was a beautiful city. Europeans take for granted the architectural marvels that sit between their glass train stations and their shoe stores. There are monuments in European cities that predate the end of the Roman Republic but they don't spare a glance as they walk past them. It's too important to be aloof.

At the Pont du Gard, Laura, Cali and I climbed to where the aqueduct ended. Alright, I'm done writing. I got to stand on top of the wall of the amphitheater. At least three or four stories up. maybe five.

Yeah. I'm awesome.

Sometimes I feel so lucky in the friends I make. I really do seem to meet a bunch of super encouraging, lovely human beings.

Trop fatiguée

I'm too tired to write about boring classes and lovely nutella. Wednesdays are the death of me.

Romain and I played a Lord of the Rings strategy game. It only took me about fifteen minutes to lose.

:)

Je suis la Reine!

Yay! I am Queen of the Day!

Today is Épiphanie which is the day that celebrates the 3 Kings coming to visit baby Jesus. Today, the French celebrate with a round cake (bunt-like) that is supposed to be symbolic of a crown. It is called a galette in French. They cut it up into different pieces and give each person at the party a piece of cake. If you find a little figurine (known as a fève) in your piece, you're the King or Queen of the day! (And you have to buy a cake for everyone else.)

Cali and I both found the figurines in the two cakes. Hers was a fisherman and mine was a dude sleeping. I don't know if Cali likes to fish, but I sure do like to sleep.

I got a golden crown. :D

French Bread

I bought a baguette. Oh my. It was amazing - warm and crispy on the outside, warm and light on the inside. I ate about half of it all in one go. It was everything one dreams of a baguette tasting like.

Uhhhn

So I ended up being really really tired and didn't go out. I woke up a little while ago from a nap, but I'm still really tired. I feel like I should go out, but I don't want to, even though I kinda do, but also: I don't.

Reasons to go: 1. to have fun, 2. to be friendly, 3. maybe the French people from last night will be there and I might make more lasting friendships. (With real live French people.)

Reasons not to go: 1. I am very tired, 2. I'd have to walk all the way there by myself.

Some of my reasons to go involve guilt, like: it's the first weekend. I should go out, cement bonds, not be "that girl"... And the whole "walk alone" thing isn't so much about danger, it's just that it's not fun to walk all the way by myself and I needed to make my list to not go longer.

Ugh. I hate decisions like this. I really could fall asleep right now again. I fell asleep last night around 3 and then woke up at 7:20 and could not fall back asleep. I also went shopping today.

But everyone else is out.

Comments

I changed the comments settings so you don't have to have a Google account to comment. :)

Friday Was Full of Fun

So Friday. Mmm. Friday was nice. Cali, Kate, Laura and I went to the garden at the Palais des Papes where a bunch of Popes used to live instead of at the Vatican for a couple of centuries. The Palace is huge and the gardens were incredibly beautiful. They must be amazing in the summer and spring.

The really exciting part was the evening. The four of us plus Liz joined back up again and went to a fancy-pants restaurant where we all shared some desserts and I had some champagne that was very wonderful. The restaurant was decorated in black, white and silver, with lovely chairs that resembled thrones.

There are no words for that dessert. My favorite was the mousse - and mousse is not generally my favorite. It was rich and creamy, and paired with the champagne, it was an absolute delight. It was somewhat expensive though (hence the sharing) and I saw a bottle of champagne on the list for 450 euros.

We had two people wait on us, one who we believe was actually our waiter and the other who simply brought us things. When the waiter came to pick up our dishes, he warned us that the other guy (around our age) was a "bad boy" and we should watch out for him. Of course, it was all in fun but I love hearing French people say stuff like "bad boy" or "super cool" in a French accent.

After that, we went to a bar where we just hung out for a while. The music was very loud, and when we first walked in, it was Macy Gray. A lot of American music is played in France, in the stores and bars and restaurants.

The beer was okay, nothing special in my opinion, but the fun part was the conversation we started having with a couple of French people our age. We spoke back and forth in French and English, sometimes in Franglais. One of them told me I spoke French very well, but I think he was just being polite. ;) It was there at the bar that I realized I was the only brunette in the group of girls, Cali, Kate, Liz and Laura all being blonde.

One of the Frenchmen was a very light black and although his name was Max, his friends were calling him Cashew. He explained to us that he got this nickname one day when he and his friends were eating a desert that was either flavored with cashews or had cashews on it, and a friend remarked that his skin color was similar to the color of cashews. Since then, he has been called Cashew by his friends.

We didn't really feel comfortable calling him that.

They were all super friendly. At one point, the guys went outside to smoke, and the girl who first started talking to us told us that in France it is okay to accept a drink from a man and then just tell him to fuck off afterwards. Though I still don't plan on letting any guys buy me a drink, it was good to know that attitude of "You can do what you want, but I'll do what I want".

Ah, good times. We're going to go back to that bar tonight. Perhaps we will see them again? Perhaps.

Faire du Shopping

This post is out of order with the next one I'm going to post, but today I went shopping with some of the ladies. Good times were had.

Right now, there are some killer sales all over Avignon. Anywhere from 20 - 70% off. It's amazing. This dress I bought, it was only 20% off, but it looks really nice. I also got this cute top, which was on sale, and some tights.

There was this cute red top I almost got but it was a little expensive and after I tried on the dress, I was like, non non non, je voudrais la robe.

So yeah. I think I thought I had more to say but I don't.

Best Dinner EVER

Reasons why Romain is now my favorite:

1. He plays guitar and prefers the acoustic guitar to the electric guitar. (Just like me! OMG!)

2. He wants to make a band. (So cool.)

3. He wrote a song for his future band about how difficult it is to be the "perfect man".

4. He can't find anyone good enough to be in a band or to play his music. That was just the best detail I ever knew. Ever.

5. He played "Le Pont d'Avignon" and "Frère Jacques" during the mini-concert he performed while I ate cabbage and beef soup.

6. He's cooler than me and I'm in college. This last one is more of a lament on my part, but still.

Oh Romain. Were I fourteen as well, I would so be in love. I bet he's got a bunch of French ladies at school brushing up on their "oh la la"s before class.

Was that last line horribly racist? Oh well - c'est la vie!

Creepy Creepy

I had my first encounter today with the very-forward-Frenchman.

You know when you're walking down the street and you get stuck behind someone going slower than you? Well, when I listen to music, it really pumps me up and I go flying. Around where I turn off La Rue de la République for my street, BVD Raspail, I got stuck behind an older gentleman who was strolling around. Because we were only a couple of storefronts away from where I needed to turn, it was easier to just slow down and stroll behind him.

It's amazing how people have a sixth sense about others walking close behind them.

He turns around and asks me a question in French, do I live here? My default expression is a smile, which was ultimately my downfall. I respond, yes, since it's mostly true. He looks ahead again and seems to think better of it, turning around to me once more and asking me another question, which I don't understand. I ask him to repeat a couple times, after which I understand that he's asking me to drink with him. I decline and he shrugs as if to say "C'est la vie" and continues on. I turn onto BVD Raspail shortly after.

Two things of importance: 1. He knew I was American, most definitely, 2. He was middle-aged or nearing it, 3. I need to stop smiling as this only encourages such things.

List of things to Do:

1. Stop smiling so much

2. Learn to count

A case of the Wednesdays

Today was hell. Five and a half hours of class. 5.5!!! And I was sick again. Ugh. I need sleep. At least we didn't get any homework for PoliSci. It would have been due tomorrow at 9am. That would have been too much.

Ma vie en France

So apparently I don't talk about the right stuff on my blog, people have told me, ignoring the fact that it is my blog.

Ahem.

My room/Ma chambre:

It's pretty big, especially for a room in Europe. It's bigger than Romain's room, I think, but it's colder than the rest of the apartment because there's kind of an ante-chamber, off which there are three doors - the one that leads to my room, the one that leads to the center of the apartment, aka the hallway, and the one that leads into their family/living room. Everything beyond the antechamber is pretty well heated. It makes sense given that I am clearly in the room they use only for guests and storage.

The cats really like ma chambre. Yesterday I had to open the glass doors that lead out onto my small (very small) balcony, because one of the cats had jumped from the other balcony to mine to try and get in. My bed is about full-size, which is nice, but the pillows are kind of useless for propping up against. I have a small whicker couch and chair that I don't use because the demon cat sits there. Instead of a coffee table, there is a cardboard box with a blanket on it.

The desk is modern in appearance and has several items clearly left over from students before me. The armoire is huge but I only use a third of it, given that the rest is filled with clothes and such.

The apartment/L'appartement:

It's nice. Small. Kinda worn down. But as my mère d'acueil was showing me around, she explained that it was worth it to her to live in a not-so-nice apartment because of the quartier, the convenience, etc. There is one bathroom (to my knowledge - there might be another off from the mother's bedroom, but I doubt it) and one bathroom, meaning it has a shower and a sink, but no toilet.

The kitchen is tiny and when we eat together, we sit at a tiny table on tiny stools. They eat much faster than I do and it's very embarrassing to sit there, trying to shovel down food and finish everything while they wait and argue in French. (Romain is very sassy. Everyday he gets sassier.)

My classes/Mes cours:

I am taking Translation (which is more like two classes), Oral Techniques, Writing Techniques, Political Science: Democracies, and The Philosophy of Aesthetics. I have four classes today and I don't want to think about it. There is a serious flaw in how HWS converts our credits from this course because in a normal semester we spend 12 hours a week in four classes and here we spend 15 hours in five classes a week. That's a legitimate extra class, not to mention the fact that it seems like Traduction is going to be like two classes.

Okay, well I have to go to class. Ta ta! A bientôt.

Again

I did it again. She asked me if I wanted more and I said yes, thinking she had asked if I was full. So she piles up my plate, except this time I can't even pretend to be hungry and eat it.

There is cheese on everything.

Ugh, I was sick today. It wasn't until towards the end of orientation, so that was good, but it was pretty miserable.

Why am I so tired?

Why am I so tired? I slept from at least midnight last night until noon today, then fell asleep around 3 and woke up at 5. And I'm still tired.

Cats!

The cats won't leave me alone! And I saw another one! Ah!

The calico one is scratching at my door, right now... I don't understand why she likes this room so much. All she does is sit on top of the armoire.

So.

So. Wow.

This break has been something else, I tell ya. It was awesome to hang out with Josh for two weeks. He made visiting the family very fun. No offense to them, but sometimes I feel a little left out, like I don't really connect with anyone there. *chuckles* Sometimes I feel like I just make really awkward jokes and I wonder if my extended family ever talks to themselves about how weird I am, once I leave.

They would. Pff.

lol, Anyway.

You know what was nice? New Year's Eve. Josh dragged me to his hometown for a little soirée his friends were having. Usually these things make me really nervous because, while I like his friends, I can never think of anything to say and I worry that I'm intruding on time they'd rather be spending with just Josh.

But it was very nice. We played pool and the Human Knot and I never felt truly awkward. :)

But alas, for yon boyfriend is gone once more. And though I shall miss him, it is time to look towards France, my future, and how I will not-fail-out-of-school-this-semester, which most definitely needed all those hyphens.

You know what I'm really excited about? The fact that it'll be 50 degrees in Avignon when I arrive.

Things to Do:

1. Pack

2. Call insurance company, those bastards, for messin' up my prescription

3. Um... forget something